Regiane Cristina Villas Boas Gonzaga (photo) is an educator with Master’s Degree in Applied Behaviour Analysis, Psycho-pedagogy and Autism. She lives in her hometown of Matão, in the Brazilian state of São Paulo. She works professionally with autism and is also the mother of an autistic child. Her son had a late diagnosis, which has had a negative impact on his situation. She has written a book, recently published by EME Publishing House, sharing her experience in a moving and realistic style. In the following interview, she tells us about her personal experience and the book, which is entitled O Autismo em Minha Vida (Autism in My Life).

What is the idea behind the book O Autismo em minha vida?
It comes from my desire to help other families and professionals who deal with autism. My aim was to share all that I have learned along the years both in my studies and in my personal life. After all, I believe that we shouldn’t keep the knowledge to ourselves once we acquire it. We must share it in order to benefit other people.
What has been your biggest challenge as the mother of an autistic child?
The biggest challenge for me was to deal with the unknown. More than ten years ago, we didn’t hear as much about autism as we do now. These days, any internet search will come up with an endless number of texts explaining and advising you what to do. But that wasn’t the case then! The main challenge for me now is to deal with his transition from childhood to adulthood. He’s already 16 and I am a quite worried about this phase.
Having studied this subject in depth and living the experience at home, what aspect of autism has particularly drawn your attention?
What really strikes me is the width of the autistic spectrum, which goes from the subtlest to the most severe level. Also, the fact that one level of autism can differ so much from the other ones.
How has Spiritism helped you to face that reality?
Spiritism has made me stop seeing myself as a victim. That happened when I understood how the law of action and reaction, of cause and effect, works, once we take into account the fact that Spirits are immortal. That’s when I finally realised that nothing happens by chance and that we go exactly through what we need to go through. That can be the result of a mission that we agreed to undertake, or the result of our acts in previous lives or even a trial we may have accepted in order to help us in our process of spiritual development. My son’s spiritual needs have also been taken into account. What really matters, however, is the fact that I was able, from then on, to understand the meaning of God’s justice and mercifulness in my life. And that has given a great comfort to me.
How much has the late diagnosis affected the development of his autism?
Matheus was diagnosed when he was five and a half. Some children can now be diagnosed even before they are one year old. An early diagnosis is crucial for the beginning of the treatment that will help reduce future symptoms of autism. In my case, we also suffered the consequences of the lack of professional guidance then. No one really knew how to deal with autism at the time, including professionals. We were all learning together! And each one of us has done our best, but we lacked the proper information and preparation to deal with the situation. I often say that if I knew then what I know now, perhaps I wouldn’t have made so many mistakes.
What would you say, from the bottom of your mother’s heart, to other mothers facing this difficult reality?
Don’t give up! Difficult times will come! But never forget to ask for God’s help. He knows everything and sees everything. Ask for strength, courage and resignation. Don’t feel guilty. You’re doing your best! Do whatever you can. Try to read and learn about the subject so you are able to help. And don’t forget that you also need to be looked after. Seek help if you feel you need. And more than anything else: LOVE! After all, love is the only way.
What would you like to highlight from all your battles?
I am still fighting big battles and many others will certainly come. But what really stays with us in the end are the lessons, all that we have learned at every new challenge.
How do you feel now?
I’m in peace now. I no longer carry with me that feeling of anger, especially towards God. I know that all this is happening for a reason, to help me develop and grow.
Is there anything else you would like to add?
Even though autism has made me shed so many tears, even though it was the cause of so much anger and outrage, it has made me strong. My son’s autism has led me to abandon my comfort zone. I decided to study and did my degree and specialisation. It is thanks to it that I now have published book about this issue and I have a clinic where I can put into practice all that I have learned. My son’s autism has transformed my life.