Special

By Marcus De Mario

Family, school and education

Many parents, troubled by the behavior of their children, who are not always obedient, are literally sending their children and teenagers to full-time schools. When this is not possible, they enroll them in language courses, information technology classes, and in sports activities. They do everything to occupy the children as much as possible and have a few hours of peace at home, with the belief that school, courses, clubs will put the children in line, and will make them spend their energy and discipline themselves.

In fact, many parents show at home lack of patience, tolerance and much less moral authority with their children. They do not carry out their children's education and transfer this duty to the school and other institutions.

We need to learn to educate them for autonomy, solidarity, and for kindness. However, for that we first have to educate ourselves, i.e., we have to fight back indolence, self-indulgence, hypocrisy, individualism, things that our society is tired of, causing bad consequences, as can be seen on a daily basis.

How can we demand obedience and good behavior from our children, if we confuse this with total and exaggerated respect for ourselves, restricting their freedom? Even worse, giving bad examples, because on our part, we are not always obedient and we do not always maintain good behavior. It is like the mother, who is addicted to sweets and chocolates. She is somewhat obese, with high cholesterol, sedentary. However, she demands that her daughter, at school, only eat healthy foods and participate in activities that involve physical exercise. Without giving her own example, this is an education without effect, and if the daughter in turn starts eating sweets and chocolates, she will certainly be punished and, because she was not obedient, she will end up enrolled in all possible courses beyond school.

Are there difficult children? Problem children? We believe that there are children that are a challenge. Only a good, constant education can give them self-control, with no strings attached, without overdoing, but with a lot of dialogue, good examples and moral authority, which should start even before the cradle, because in the mother's womb, the child already hears and feels everything we convey to it.

We must make all efforts to unite family and school. That it is necessary to have a new school, new methodologies, there is no doubt, but from this point to run to "innovations" with no pedagogical foundation, it goes a long way.

Remembering that we are immortal spirits and that, therefore, children bring a baggage of experiences, learning and achievements, we cannot transfer education to the exclusive environment of the school, or even other social institutions, divorce the family from this process. Parents and teachers must join hands, as well as in the scope of the Spiritist Center, when parents and other guardians cannot and must not hand over their children for Evangelization, and return home. They need to be part of the Family Group, which should take place at the same time as child and youth evangelization.

In the domestic sphere, the so-called Gospel at Home must involve all members of the family, including children, adolescents and young people, and not just the so-called adults.

Family, school, Spiritist Center and other educational institutions must unite for the good formation of the new generations. The distance between them brings disastrous consequences for society, as we have seen. Moreover, that we seek, in all instances, the moralization and spiritualization of the new generations, if we want a world at peace, more just and balanced.

May parents be easier, so that children may be less complicated. May teachers be more humane, so that students may become more humane too. It is in love that family and school must meet. It is in love that we will be able to transform individuals so that we can gradually witness the transformation for the better of society as a whole.

May parents be easier, so that children may be less difficult. May teachers be more humane, so that students may be more sensitive. It is in love that family and school must meet. It is in love that we will be able to transform individuals so that we can gradually witness the transformation for the better of society as a whole.

 

Responsibility of the parents

We are watching extremely rebellious, authoritarian and selfish children; young people who do not respect any type of authority; exhibitionist, sensual and violent adults. Then, there is talk of the failure of education, pointing to the school as the main culprit, the villain of the social chaos we are experiencing. We cannot help agreeing that the school has long since lost its place in education, but we cannot blame it for all social ills, as another basic institute has seriously failed in the education of new generations and in the re-education of adults: the family.

Parents are responsible for educating their children through good examples, good advice, useful guidance, correction of bad character tendencies, preparing them for life in society. It is in the family that one is educated for duties, responsibilities, respecting others, and for being ethical. When parents, as well as other guardians, fail in this education, society suffers, as the school, which must also work on moral education, cannot and should not replace the family. No matter how much a teacher's love and dedication may be the teacher cannot replace either the father or the mother of that student - child or young person.

The educational task of the parents is so important that the Superior Spirits make it clear in question 582 of The Book of Spirits. If they fail, they will answer before the divine law for the deviations of the children, because they were entrusted by God to the earthly parents, who accepted this mission while carrying out reincarnation planning, i.e., still in the spiritual world.

We are not saying that it is easy to raise a rebellious, indolent or lazy child, but let us remember that they are challenge children, requiring greater doses of love, patience, perseverance and moral authority. As more frequently the parents make an effort to put these four tools into practice, the more they will grow in morality and spirituality, that is, in the effort to educate the child, one educates oneself.

Teaching to respect the other, to understand him; to help with household chores; knowing how to deal with the “no”; to develop virtues; and to have limits. These tasks belong to the parents within the family. If this is not accomplished, we will continue to see students hitting teachers, young people ending up in clubs with alcoholic beverages, drugs and unbalanced sex. We will continue to watch adults corrupt themselves for money and power and violence taking over society.

The family must be a social institution for the education of new generations, also preparing future parents. And parents do not forget to connect these reincarnating souls with the Gospel, the roadmap of life's light, because there is lack of Christ in most hearts, it is lacking to sensitize feelings, to touch souls, and this work must be done at home, in the family.

The school will associate itself with the family's work, not remaining only in the formal commitment of teaching curricular contents. However, we repeat, the school cannot replace the family, just as it cannot completely correct the lack of education that children and young people carry from home. Now, if the family unites with the school, and the school generously welcomes the family, then there will be light at the end of the tunnel. That is why the work of “learning communities” is emerging, involving school, family, as well as the community. Together, holding hands, working together, uniting experiences and efforts in education.

Parents should not forget that the mission to educate belongs to them, and that the key to moral progress and the happiness of man and humanity lies in the moral education of their children.

 

Marcus De Mario is an educator, writer, and speaker; coordinator of Seara de Luz, a Spiritist Study Group; editor of the Spiritist Guidance channel on YouTube; director of Ibem Educa, a non-governmental educational organization. 


 

Translation:
Eleni Frangatos - eleni.moreira@uol.com.br

 
 

     
     

O Consolador
 Revista Semanal de Divulgação Espírita